Ridiculous Pens

Today’s post is somewhat inspired by a YouTube video. “Weird pen collabs” seemed like a fun topic, at least until I realized the only one I could find/think of was the Montegrappa & Harry Potter series. And that’s only weird for what Montegrappa chose to draw inspiration from. The Quidditch pitch, really? But I digress.

So, I modified the idea to ridiculous pens. The pens I chose are either ridiculously bad OR ridiculously good. On the bad side of things you have poor design and pricing. On the good side you have amazing showcase of materials and skill. I’m sure there are many other ridiculous pens I’ve missed, but I tried to go for a variety, and I think I succeeded.

Side note before I begin: I’m not judging the artistry or craftsmanship on the “bad” pens, just the decisions.

Now, let’s start small and work our way up, shall we?

Pineider Forged Carbon

I’ve complained about this pen before, but, ultimately, it’s not a big deal. The mystery filler model was designed to “[allow] you to watch the unique filling system in action.” It’s meant to show its innards, but this version covers it up! Completely ridiculous, in my opinion.

Platinum Curidas

The Curidas was great, in theory. But, even ignoring the unintentional issues people have with it, Platinum’s decision to require you to disassemble your pen in order to fill it was more than a little ridiculous.

Montegrappa Chaos

Widely panned as the ugliest pen ever made, it was ridiculous of Montegrappa to allow such an expensive pen to be designed for a single person. They should have worked with Sylvester Stalloneto design something more geared towards typical taste. And the promotional video is, if anything, even more ridiculous.

Visconti Taj Mahal

The amount of work this pen must have required is mind boggling. The filigree is ridiculously beatiful, and color-coordinated with the base material — gold on red, silver on black, and rose gold on ivory. However, were I to own one, I’d worry about damaging it. With metal that thin, it must be incredibly delicate.

ARTUS Koi Carps

To be honest, virtually any ARTUS pen would qualify for this list. I chose this one because it has a good picture. With details requiring single-hair brushes in places and materials that call for a serious mastery to work with them to this level, ARTUS pens represent a ridiculous amount of work and talent.

ST Dupont L’Aquart Amethyst

I don’t think I need to say much about this one. it’s a pen, made out of amethyst from Brazil, on a stand cut from an Uruguayan amethyst geode. I know we all fear dropping our pens, but imagin how much this pen must amplify that fear. You’d have to be ridiculously careful with it.

Montegrappa Moon Landing Gold & Titanium

Montegrappa did an amazing job with the “standard” limited edition. It was a fantastic recreation of the Saturn V rocket. But then they went ridiculously overboard with the 10 times more expensive gold and titanium edition.

The enanmeled version looks SO much better. In comparison, the gold and titanium is a sad shadow. A better decision, in my opinion, would have been to make an enameled edition out of solid white gold or platinum. Then they could hit that crazy high price point but keep the aesthetics of the enameled edition. Or, they could have just skipped the deluxe model altogether.

Montegrappa Samurai and Viking

Yep, Montegrappa again. But this time for good reasons. Many of Montegrappas limited edition pens are works of art. But these two are another level entirely. The detail is ridiculous. The letter openers they come with are ridiculous. The solid gold editions are… you get the point. These two pens are fantastic, but ridiculous.

Aurora Diamante

The Diamante is set with 1,919 — over 30 carats — of De Beers diamonds on a solid platinum barrel and is personalized with a coat of arms, signature, or portrait. First off, that’s A LOT of diamonds! It’s a bit hard to tell if the section is encrusted as well, but if it is, it must be uncomfortable to write with. Regardless, it seems ridiculous to turn a writing instrument into nothing more than a display piece. After all, who would actually write with this?

Montblanc Tribute to the Great Wall LE1 Imperial

This pen is gorgeous. And it comes with a ridiculous price tag to prove it: $1,978,500. However, the specs are crazy. It’s made of solid 18K gold. It’s set with sapphires, rubies, tourmaline, and diamonds. There is a miniature music box in the barrel. And it’s crowned with a 4.69 carat diamond. Dare I say it might actually be worth it?

Bonus: Tibaldi Fulgor Nocturnus

Originally, this pen held the top spot. After all, what could top an $8,000,000 pen in the ridiculous category? However, when I did a bit of digging for photos, I learned that its $8M price tag comes from the winning bid at a charity auction, so I had to disqualify it. But, its still worth a mention. This otherwise unassuming pen has 945 black diamonds set on the cap and barrel and 123 rubies on the cap.

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Thanks for reading to the end, I hope you enjoyed my post. Do you agree with my list? What ridiculous pens did I miss? Let me know in the comments! I’d love to hear from you.

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