If you’ve been here for a while, you know I like to keep this space as positive as possible. But, every once in a while, I let in some snark. Today is one of those posts, which you probably already knew from the title.
I’m sure some, or all, of these will be unpopular opinions. However, I have valid-to-me reasons for my opinions. So, I hope you enjoy the honesty and sprinkles of snark I chose to indulge in for this post.
This isn’t an exhaustive list, but it’s most of it.
Aurora
I jumped on the Aurora bandwagon for a while. But, the nibs were just meh — I know, blasphemy! Once I decided that I was no longer buying pretty ink sticks, that was it for Aurora pens. Well, that and the 100o Anniversario pen thing. To me, Aurora pens really only have their looks going for them, and that means they aren’t worth their premium price. I want more than just surface beauty, I want depth — AKA an excellent writing experience.
Bexley
My first and only Bexley was a disappointment almost from the first moment. It was dry, the cap finial band wasn’t glued on, and it was a bear both to take apart to clean and to put back together. Tolerances seemed to be less than normal because I had to be super careful when reassembling the pen, or it would leak. It was just a captured converter; it should have been easy to disassemble, clean, and reassemble. Very annoying.
Caran d’Ache
That objectively pretty year of the dragon pen was the genesis of my grudge against Caran d’Ache. If you don’t already know the story, this pen was delivered in crappy packing, and I was gypped a box, among other things. I know that’s not a huge issue, after all, the pen was just fine and it functions well. But, at $50 plus $12 shipping, it seriously pissed me off. Did I mention that I bought direct from the Caran d’Ache website?
Internal “swirl” pens
Think Additive Pens, Hex Pens, etc. Pens like these really need a full fill or close to it to function properly. They don’t keep the ink flowing with minimal fills like I prefer. They are also a pain in the butt to clean. And hard-to-clean is a deal-breaker for me, as you’ll see below.
Lamy Safari/Al-Star/Lx
After trying so many other nibs, I realized I don’t really like the “standard” steel Lamy nib. It’s also rather dry, not a favorite. On top of that, since the feed and section don’t come apart, it’s also annoying to clean. Ain’t nobody got time for that!
Montegrappa Fortuna
I’ve tried 3 different Fortuna models, one in wood, one in metal, and one in some kind of plastic. I’ve sold two and retired one because I couldn’t stand the hard starts. It didn’t matter if I’d left a pen untouched for a couple of days, or just been writing a few minutes before. Neither weather nor storage position — laying on its side or nib up — mattered either. I’m pretty sure that the issue is the thick threads, exacerbated by only having a couple of turns to close the pen.
Noodler’s
I know that, depending on who you talk to, there are many reasons not to buy Noodler’s products. However, these reasons are entirely based on the products themselves. The pens stink. Yes, the smell eventually mostly dissipates. But, the pens aren’t special enough — in my opinion — to bother dealing with the smell. The writing experience is adequate at best, and I can ger much prettier materials elsewhere.
Opus 88 Mini
I’ve enjoyed my Opus pens and will probably pick up another soon. But, after waiting ages to find the “right” mini to purchase, when I finally bought one, it was a terrible disappointment. At $80+, it’s about $20 more than a standard TWSBI Mini AL, but it feels cheap in comparison. If you handed me both pens and told me the prices, I’d assume the TWSBI was the more expensive one. I don’t think the price matches the construction or tactile experience.
Pilot Vanishing Point
I know, I know. Put away the pitchforks and torches. The Vanishing Point — any clicky fountain pen, really — is just fine. It writes beautifully, as I’d expect from a Pilot pen. It looks pretty. But, IT’S A NIGHTMARE TO CLEAN!
First you have to get the nib unit clean. It’s not a simple procedure, especially for one, like myself, who changes ink color family with every pen fill. But, and here’s the real clencher, the stupid little trap door gets ink on it and you cannot get it clean! So, with each new pen fill, when you first click the pen to start writing, you have contaminated ink. And it takes a surprisingly long time to get all of the ink off of the door.
Pineider
Oh, Pineider. I’ve owned three Pineider pens, if you count the half a day before I returned the Black Prince as owning it. The Keys of Heaven was nice, but the M nib was incredibly wet and wrote more like a B, so I sold it. The Arco Oak had a “soft” F nib, but it wasn’t particularly impressive, despite all of the marketing around that quill nib.
Then came the Honeycomb Black Prince. With a whopping $798 price tag — I traded work for it — I assumed that the body was metal. Maybe an anodized aluminum. Nope, it’s plastic. And it felt like plastic — cheap plastic. I didn’t ink it because I knew I was sending it back, so I have no idea what the nib was like.
Retro 51 fountain pens
There isn’t anything wrong with the Retro 51 fountain pens, they just aren’t for me. I can’t even really put my finger on what the issue(s) is/are. Something just isn’t right for me. I’ve kept the Wings of the Monarch for the design. If anyone has the rollerball version and would like to trade, let me know!
TWSBI Eco
I’ve owned 22 TWSBI pens — 9 580 series, 7 minis, 2 Eco series, 1 Go, and the three “special” piston-fillers (e.g. Aurora, Draco). Out of those 22 pens, I’ve had problems with 2 of them… no bonus points for guessing which ones.
Both Eco series pens had crap nibs. They were scratchy and dry. I could have excused one as an anomaly. The second one was it for me, especially since the nibs on every other pen were fabulous.
I’m aware that this one is probably bad luck. I’ve heard from people who have had the exact opposite experience I’ve had. But, I’m not going to bemoan a reason to not purchase a pen that has multiple colorway releases each year.
Vintage filling mechanisms
OK, OK, it’s not all vintage filling mechanisms. It’s mostly ones that fill using some kind of vacuum — button filler, lever filler, etc. Most of these are in pens where you can’t remove the nib for easy cleaning. See where I’m going with this? Do you know how long it takes to fully clean a lever filler when your only option is to fill and empty using the lever? Waaaaay too fricken’ long!
But I’m not completely against them. I have an Esterbrook J and an LJ; they’re lovely — because I can remove the nib for cleaning. My Parker Vacumatic with a glorious factory stub? I sold it. The annoyance of cleaning outweighed the glory of the nib.
What pen(s) will you never buy again? Are there any on my sh*t list that you love? Let me know in the comments! I’d love to hear from you.
Thanks for reading to the end, I hope you enjoyed my post. Make sure to subscribe to my blog or follow me on Instagram so you don’t miss any posts. I generally post at least once a week.
Attribution: The image I used in the share images for Instagram and Facebook is a modification of “Yes and No” and “Various emotional expressions” by “miniwide studio” on Vecteezy.com
I love my Vanishing Point, and so far, no issue with hard cleaning. But I agree about Lamy Safari and TWSBI Eco being pens I wouldn’t get again. I also got lucky, I guess, with my Noodler’s Ahab. It didn’t stink that bad, and it is a good writer, but it’s not special.
I enjoy the wonderful designs Retro 51 comes out with, and so far, they’ve been good writers, but I don’t feel the need to get more, (at least not right now!).
Filling mechanisms are a factor in which pen I buy. I much prefer cartridge/converter pens. But I have several vintage pens that are lever/sac fillers and though it’s kind of tedious, the pens are so cool it’s worth it. Yes, the Esterbrook J nibs screw out easily which is much easier for cleaning.
Piston fillers are another type I don’t favor, but depends on how great the pen is. I didn’t find the Eco’s piston filling system to be particularly durable. But, I will say, the TWSBI in a 1.1 stub handles shimmer inks well, and that’s about all I ever use it for, and rarely.
I second the comment about Conklin and Monte Verde. Terrible quality pens.
I keep wanting to own more Pilot pens (because everyone raves about theirs) but the whole black pen only on special nibs and lack of good limited edition models is enough to turn me away. Also, I have yet to truly enjoy a Pilot nib over most others. They are really well tuned and wet writers, but have little personality IMO. The only Pilot gold nib that I don’t think I’ll ever let go is that new(er) “Signature” nib. Honestly, the best Pilot fountain pen I own was a Prera I gave as a hand-me-down to a co-worker I was trying to pen-able, and my Metropolitan.
All the custom makers out there are really nice and friendly, but there are some I just wouldn’t buy again. Most being generally pretty swirly JoWo/Bock ink sticks, but minor details or, what I feel, are just lack of attention to details in craftspersonship that just turns me away. I have my favorite makers now and am always open to exploring new-to-me makers, but I’ve limited it to only buying online from makers that I know have consistently well-turned products. I reserve any future purchases from new makers to in-person only.
Piston filler pens in general I tend not to buy anymore, especially if they don’t have an ink window.
There are many brands and individual modes of pens that I’ve purchased just to try but quickly found there was something that just wasn’t for me. Nothing against them as pens, they’re all pretty and functional. I think part of that is just that we don’t always get to see a lot of pens in person first, so it ends up as a failed experiment, or a catch-and-release situation.
I know a lot of the Chinese-maker pens are excellent values and they’ve really improved their quality exponentially over the last 5, or more, years, but the nibs are just boring and uninspiring. That alone is enough to just not bother.
Lastly, it pains me to say it but I’m about done with Sailor (at least for pens). I own about 20+ of the gold nib pens and the nibs have been so inconsistent that it’s sort of turned me off the brand entirely. I still love their ink and feel the quality of the pens are good, but the nibs are just so inconsistent, and I’ve had so many poor ones that I seriously hesitate when new shinys come out. I’d say more than 1/2 my Sailors have nibs that need tuning or were just shaped poorly at the factory (from what Richard Binder has mentioned to me after working on a few of my Sailors).
Not only that, but they have a ZERO refund policy. My last Sailor had a poorly shaped nib. I sent it back to have the nib replaced. They put a new nib on but it was also not consistent with what I expect. After about 3 back-and-forths, I pleaded with them to just refund me. They told me “it’s not in our policy”. That alone was my tipping point. I may be unfairly reacting to this, since a lot of makers don’t offer refunds (no matter what condition the pen is in) but if you’ve given it the good college try several times, you should be able to just walk away from the situation…especially considering they are a “luxury” good.
A comment about your post. I’ve been able to remove the feed from every one of my Lamy Safaris. Once you get the nib off, put one of these rubber grippers around the feed and a good careful pull will get it out. Some are easier to get out than others, just be mindful of the alignment.
That’s a shame about the Opus 88 Mini, they look so cute! I had been considering one of them myself, but I recently got my first Opus 88 pen, a Koloro, and the nib is just so scratchy! I have a new nib on the way for it, but it has slightly put me off, even though I know it’s just probably bad luck.
And whilst I love my Pilot Decimo, I do agree with them being hard to clean out! I’ve found that with all my retractable fountain pens, which is annoying because they’re so convenient to use, just so hard to clean!
I have several Opus 88 pens, two min and one Koloro in the clear plastic, and another in the multicolor model that resembles a vase. They all write nicely once cleaned out. The Koloro, bought used, was marked “as is”, but once it was cleaned and slightly reassembled it is really a fun writer. Have you had yours looked at? Even slight misalignment in the tine ends can make a pen scratchy. Best wishes for transforming yours into a writing champion.
I didn’t have an issue with the nib, the problem for me is the pen construction. I’m happy you love your minis.
1) Conklin and Monteverde. Just not worth having, even if they do write which is not a given…
2) Nahvalur. Anything made over a brass tube, no matter how pretty, is way way too heavy for me.
Pens I will never buy again? Hooboyohboy….I will never buy anything ever from TWSBI. Not just because they put that horrible self-destructing plastic on the market without seeming to have tested it, but because the have willfully bullied, sued, threatened not only other penmakers but the retailers on whose cooperation and goodwill their existence depends. Pendom is a smallish, niche hobby, and nobody has time for a company that picks unsupportable fights for no good reason. No, TWSBI did not invent the fill system that has been used for ages by Pelikan, and even if it was ever patented that patent would have expired long ago. Next, Visconti, whose material looks pretty but whose nibs are too often unusable. For what their pens cost, they should at least write. Lamy Safari looks and feels like something from a box of breakfast cereal. When it was announced that Montegrappa was transitioning from a brand you could buy from a pen dealer to a hoity-toity boutique brand, I had to snap one up before they became too hard to get. Also, reviews of the Elmo were pretty glowing. But the nib was a piece of garbage. I had it babied and tuned and trimmed and coddled by a terrific nibmeister and now it does write. The re-animated Esterbrooks started using the same names that the real Esterbrook company used for their pens it didn’t make a bit of sense. The pens have next to nothing in common. It’s not that I dislike the zombie pens, it’s that the stunt the new owners of the brand pulled is nonsensical and confusing. Same for the new and not really improved Parker 51, whose construction, nib, material is not even close to the sleek workhorse classic it resembles, though the price is far higher. Ok, I’ll stop now. Thanks for letting me rant.