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AC Valhalla: Post Updates

Posted in Reviews

Before I start, if you have not read my previous posts on the game and the marketing, I highly suggest you do so, otherwise this post will likely make little sense.

I wasn’t planning to write anything else about Assassin’s Creed Valhalla after ripping the game and the marketing to shreds. However, I have information updates for both posts. Rather than update the posts themselves, where no one will ever see the information, I’m writing this post.

The Game

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The glitches still abound, sadly. The inability to talk to important NPCs in Ravensthorpe persists, despite another update to the game. I have now completed two of the three story arcs (both of the Eivor storylines) and still can’t change my ship or crew, buy maps for missed items, or sell fish.

The game is still crashing every 6 hours or so. I’ve lost exact count, but I’m at around 35 crashes.

There are side events in Valhalla called anomalies. They are the worst thing Ubisoft has ever subjected people to. I’d rather read the entire 2020 tax year guidance book than play through another anomaly. And, ironically, after you’ve completed the first anomaly, the trophy is called “It’s Not a Bug, It’s a Feature!” Maybe that’s how they view all the problems with Valhalla.

And then, there is one awesome thing I discovered. If you talk to a stable owner — but not at Ravensthorpe, because that’s someone affected by the aforementioned NPC glitch — and choose Rider Training, then you can teach your mount to swim, and improve it’s stamina about tenfold. So, yeah. Wooo. *sigh*

NOTE: With the insanity at the Capitol, this post was pushed back a few days. Between writing it and publishing it today, I downloaded and installed the most recent update which finally fixed the NPC issue in Ravensthorpe (now that we’ve all finished the game) and seems to have fixed some other glitches (like treasure hoards not being available to collect). Maybe the DLCs will be glitch free? Is that too much to hope for?

The Advertising

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It’s possible that Eivor’s surname is mentioned earlier in the game and I’ve forgotten, or missed it. However, at the end of the Order of the Ancients story arc, you get access to a study with two letters you have to interact with. One of them mentions Eivor Varinsdottir — main character, Eivor. To the best of my knowledge — I watched a few gameplay videos on YouTube — this does not change if you play as the male Eivor.

For those unaware, Norse surnames are patronymic. This means that the surname is, literally translated, [father’s name] son or [father’s name] daughter. Therefore, Eivor’s surname translates to Daughter of Varin. Not son. Never son.

So even within the game, outside of Valhalla, we are told Eivor is female, only female. Granted, it’s well hidden, and most players likely wouldn’t even see it, as I had to scroll to see her name. But still, Ubisoft overwhelmingly marketed a male Eivor.

Final Thoughts

Unless something amazing happens in the DLCs, I likely won’t write anymore about Valhalla. When it’s working well, it’s an enjoyable game. But then you find a glitch, and you’re reminded of how much is wrong with it.

I still find myself wanting to like it, and I think that’s why I’m still playing. Like it’s magically going to get better one day. It’s not. I know I’m lying to myself, but hope springs eternal. However, silver linings, it means I can go back and play Odyssey and still think it’s an amazing game.

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